Sister Wives, Social Media, and the Sovereignty of God

 

Every once in a while, as you wander through the streets of social media, you stumble upon a meme that either makes you laugh out loud, shake your head in disbelief, or sit there completely shook.

Today I found one of those. My first reaction was laughter, the kind that comes from recognizing the strange paradoxes of life.

The meme joked about the night Jacob spent with Leah, thinking she was Rachel. One person blamed Jacob (“Men are wicked!”), and another replied, “Fear women,” as if Leah had masterminded the whole thing. The absurdity made me laugh, but it also made me pause.

Because if you’ve read the story, you know the real architect of that chaos wasn’t Jacob or Leah, it was Laban.

And as I sat with it, I felt that familiar tug: everything in Scripture is there for a reason, and usually for a lesson. So, I let my mind wander into that ancient household to see what it might teach us in our 21st‑century lives.

Deception Complicates Everything

Laban’s lie set off a chain reaction of hurt, rivalry, and years of unrequited longing. His deception was rooted in cultural pressure, greed, and the desire to appease people, not so different from the curated performances we see on social media today.

A “small” lie can grow legs.
A “white lie” can reshape someone’s entire story.
And sometimes the people who suffer most aren’t the ones who lied.

Love Isn’t Always Instant, Sometimes It’s Learned

Jacob loved Rachel from the start. Leah, on the other hand, lived in the shadow of comparison. Yet over time, Jacob learned to appreciate her. Together they had ten of the twelve sons who became the tribes of Israel.

That doesn’t erase the pain, but it reminds me that love, healing, and acceptance often require effort, patience, and time. Life rarely gives us perfect beginnings, but grace can rewrite the middle.

God’s Plan Still Unfolds Through Imperfect People

Despite the deception, jealousy, favoritism, and heartbreak, God still fulfilled His promise to Abraham. The twelve tribes came from this messy, complicated family.

It’s a reminder that God’s sovereignty isn’t threatened by human mistakes.
Our circumstances don’t cancel His plan.
Our detours don’t derail His purpose.

 My Own Quiet Bearing

As life unfolds for me, I’ve known betrayal, dishonesty, loneliness, and the ache of distance. I’ve also known deep love, joy, and the kind of connection that doesn’t require explanation.

The hard moments feel sharper because of the miles between me and the people who “get” me without effort. From the outside, someone might ask, Why stay far from home when you could live close to those who love you?

I don’t have a perfect answer.
Life isn’t always simple.
And sometimes obedience (LOL in my case the need to survive) looks like wandering.

This is the heart of Sojourning in America, learning to carry both the beauty and the ache of living between worlds. Like Leah, like Jacob, like Rachel, I’m navigating imperfect circumstances, unexpected turns, and the quiet work of trusting God’s higher plan.

I’m learning that bearing life quietly doesn’t mean bearing it alone.
It means trusting that even in the mess, God is weaving something purposeful.
It means believing that distance, disappointment, and detours can still lead to destiny.

And it means remembering that the God who brought order out of Jacob’s household can bring clarity, peace, and direction to mine.

When the Internet Goes Silent: A Wanderer’s Morning in America

 I don’t know how people lived before mobile phones. It’s embarrassing to admit, but when mine isn’t with me, I feel like something essential is missing. It’s not just a device for calls anymore; it’s my journal, my news source, my Bible, my music, my entertainment, my little portal to the world I love but no longer live in.

Because I know this attachment isn’t entirely healthy, I’ve spent years pruning the things that keep me glued to the screen. Some social media apps had to go. I didn’t like the version of myself that reached for the phone before my eyelids were fully open.

These days, my mornings look different. I silence the alarm, whisper a small selah of gratitude to God, and sit quietly with my thoughts before the rhythm of work begins. Working from home gives me that luxury or temptation, depending on the day. And because I’m not a morning person, breakfast rarely happens before noon. The term brunch was probably coined for people like me.

But this isn’t a food post. It’s about my love‑hate relationship with the phone and how that relationship was tested today.

Every night, I put my phone on airplane mode. With loved ones scattered across time zones, it’s the only way to sleep without being startled awake. So, each morning, once I confirm nothing urgent is happening at work, I switch it back on and scan through WhatsApp. That app is a lifeline for those of us whose families live oceans away. Without it, staying connected would not only be inconsistent but cost an arm and a leg.

This morning, January 13th, the messages from my people in the pearl of Africa were to the tune of   “Keep safe.” “See you soon.” “Pray for us.” Short, urgent, unfinished sentences like people were speaking from the edge of something.

Uganda is heading into national elections on January 15th. And in the name of “free and fair elections,” the government shut down the internet. I’m not here to write a political analysis; this is still a phone post but the impact was immediate. By the time I read the messages at 7:20 a.m. PST, it was already evening in Uganda. All the messages I sent back were single ticked, they had crossed back to analog before I could respond.

The silence felt eerie. Not because of what might unfold in the coming days, but because of the sudden, heavy aloneness. Not lonely but alone. A word that doesn’t quite capture the feeling of being cut off from the people who make you feel tethered to the world.

I’m not on the phone with my loved ones all day. But knowing I can reach them matters. Knowing I can laugh with them, hear their voices, catch the small jokes and daily chaos that matters too. When the internet went off the silence was so loud, the suddenly the distance seems wider. The miles feel heavier.

And this, I suppose, is part of my ongoing journey, my sojourning in America. Living here while my heart beats in two places. Learning how fragile connection can be, learning to trust the process in the places I cannot control learning that even when the lines go quiet, God is not quiet. And neither is hope.

I don’t know if the living between worlds ever stops, the distance on days like this is even more real, but so is the grace that carries me through it.

 PS

Woke up to Uganda’s internet shut off and felt the weight of distance in a new way. 

Full Circle: The Hands That Held Me, Then and Now

 Twelve years ago, I took the leap and came to America.

On the train from Coventry to Heathrow, my big sister Ann stopped at the cashpoint, what we called the ATM here withdrew £100. She pressed it into my hand to add to the $100 I already carried. Together, that became £100 and $100, about $220 to start a new life in the unknown.

I had left some money in my Ugandan account, but I couldn’t count on it. Within the first week, I bought running shoes, and with time my small stash dwindled quickly. I chose not to get a phone line, reasoning that I lived with the only people I knew in America and could reach others through WhatsApp and Skype, which was the hit back then.

One month in, my friend Charlotte called from London via Skype. She asked if I still used my HSBC account. I said yes, though it held little. Charlotte, being who she is, sent £100 to that account. After living off just $200 for a month, her gift felt like a million dollars, unexpected, thoughtful, and deeply sustaining.

Fast forward to this year. After years of blogging, I finally took the advice of friends and family and plunged into writing a book. With dedication and a few helping hands, Sojourning in America became a reality this November. On a minimal budget, I researched self-publishing, designed the cover, and wrestled with formatting that nearly had me pulling out my hair.

I learned it was wise to publish first with an independent press before Amazon, so I chose Book Vault in the UK. Once I had the link, I shared it with friends and family there. And who were my first buyers? Ann and Charlotte, the same two who had blessed me with the money that carried me through my first months in America.

The coincidence was not lost on me. Their generosity had once helped me begin a life in a new land. Now, it helped me begin a new chapter as an author.

What began with £100 and $100 has come full circle. Ann and Charlotte’s gifts remind me that journeys are sustained not only by courage, but by the quiet generosity of others. Sojourning in America is more than my book, it is a testament to the circles of care that make belonging possible.

PS

Before I published this story, I asked Charlotte if she could send me a photo. She isn’t even on social media, but she still agreed cheerfully to take one during her train commute. When I asked who took the picture, she simply said, “Oh, I asked a stranger.” And that is Charlotte in one sentence: an introverted, quietly generous soul willing to step outside her comfort zone just to make her friends happy.

Celebrating Diversity this International Mother Language Day

 

Every day has something to celebrate if you look for it. And if you prefer not to search, the internet offers various observances for almost every day of the year. I am particularly drawn to fun observances that honor our differences and promote unity and love. When I discovered that February 21 is International Mother Language Day, I wanted to learn more about it. This day was established by UNESCO in 1999 to promote linguistic diversity, multilingualism, and cultural heritage. It pays tribute to the languages that are integral to our identities, cultures, and traditions.

While this day may seem more relevant to those who speak multiple languages or have a strong cultural connection to their mother language, it still holds value for native English speakers who may not know any other languages. It serves as an opportunity to learn about the importance of language in shaping cultures and identities. Additionally, it helps raise awareness of the challenges faced by speakers of minority languages and encourages support for language preservation efforts.

Unfortunately, as I reflect on this issue, I can't help but notice how many people from my country have avoided passing on their mother tongues. I once met someone who specifically instructed not to speak to her children in Luganda. As a result, these teenagers, who have grown up in Uganda, cannot speak any of their ethnic languages. In contrast, I've also encountered a family living in the diaspora that requires anyone who enters their home to use Luganda as the language of communication. The Baganda people are known for their politeness and adherence to formalities when addressing elders. During a recent visit to this family, the head of the household corrected me when I answered his call by simply saying "yes" instead of "yes, sir." I accepted his feedback gracefully, and I appreciate his dedication to preserving his culture as it is passed on to his children. If we do not have more individuals like him, our languages face the risk of disappearing. Over time, as fewer people become fluent speakers, the loss of these languages would mean a significant loss of cultural heritage and the erosion of our identities.

The relationship between language and perception is complex, and research suggests that languages can influence how we perceive the world. Even if you don't speak another language, this day presents an opportunity to reflect on how your language shapes your worldview, cultural heritage, and sense of belonging. We can support language preservation by learning a minority language, speaking our mother tongue, teaching children their ethnic language, or supporting language documentation projects. At the beginning of this year, I embarked on a journey to refamiliarize myself with French. I often find myself wishing I had delved deeper into language studies during my school years. If only someone had taken the time to inspire me with a passionate pep talk about the countless benefits of mastering other languages! The excitement of connecting with diverse cultures and opening doors to new opportunities could have sparked my interest. However, the silver lining is that it's never too late to embark on this journey of learning. Each new word learned is a step toward a richer, more colorful world awaiting exploration.

I believe that there is strength in diversity, and our mother tongue can be a significant asset in shaping our identities and mental faculties. This International Mother Language Day, I hope we can come together to recognize the vital role that languages play in shaping our lives and communities. By celebrating our linguistic heritage, we not only honor our personal histories but also foster a deeper understanding and respect for one another. Let us embrace our unique languages as tools of connection that enrich our shared experiences and empower us to build a more inclusive and harmonious world.

Be Kind: It’s Random Acts of Kindness Week

 

Have you ever wondered what it means to leave a lasting impact on those around you? For me, it means embodying kindness in everything I do and that is why I was thrilled to learn that the second week of February is Random Acts of Kindness Week. It was started in 1995 by Will Glennon, a philanthropist and kindness advocate. After reading a newspaper article, he was struck by the idea that small, selfless acts of kindness could profoundly impact individuals and communities. He launched a national campaign to promote and encourage people to practice random acts of kindness daily.

Since then, Random Acts of Kindness Week has blossomed into a global movement celebrated in over twenty countries, with millions participating in kindness activities yearly. Different cultures celebrate kindness uniquely, from communal gatherings to personal gestures reflecting their values. In my culture, the Baganda from Uganda, kindness equates to what we call  "obuntu bulamu," which means being considerate of others and treating them as we wish to be treated.

Kindness is something that feels natural to me, and I’ve seen firsthand how much it can brighten someone’s day. When you show kindness, it not only lifts the spirits of the person receiving it but also boosts your own self-esteem. It’s amazing how a simple act can make us all feel more connected, like we’re part of a community. Plus, those warm fuzzy feelings we get from being kind can seriously increase our happiness by releasing those "feel-good" hormones. I remember a beautiful example of this happening in a prayer group I'm part of. An anonymous person decided to bless five single mothers in the group, and hearing their heartfelt gratitude really touched everyone. It didn't just stop there; it inspired other members to step up and do something similar. It turned into a chain reaction of kindness, where everyone tried to uplift one another. Moments like these remind me how much of a positive impact we can have, not just on the individuals we help, but on our whole community. It’s all about spreading that good energy!

While Random Acts of Kindness Week offers a wonderful opportunity to emphasize the importance of kindness, it's essential to integrate it into our daily lives. Making kindness a lifestyle choice can lead to lasting change, as demonstrated by Bhutan's concept of "Gross National Happiness," which prioritizes compassion and kindness on a national level and as a result their life expectancy is 72 years.

And you know, acts of kindness don’t always have to be big or take a lot of time. When I think back, it’s often the little things that really stick with me—like when a child gives me a random hug just when I need it. It’s those simple moments that can really brighten your day! This week let’s spread kindness by doing at least one random act each day, like writing a nice note, picking up a stranger’s meal, or showing gratitude to someone who helps us. Together, we can inspire a lasting culture of kindness!

Let’s see how many smiles we can create!

Spreading the Love: Valentine's Day Traditions and More

 

Roses are red, violets are blue, and Valentine's Day is a week away from Friday! This special day is not just a time for romantic gestures; it's a celebration of love in all forms, whether for friends, family, or others who hold a special place in our hearts.

In Uganda, Valentine’s Day took root thanks to a 1990's radio presenter Peter Ssematimba who having lived in America, who said he was drawn to its romantic nature. He not only popularized it but also sold it as a lovers' day or for those in long-term relationships. Since then, it has grown, and the city of Kampala is almost always painted red on this day.

It was interesting to learn that Valentine's Day has a rich history spanning over 1,500 years. Here are a few interesting facts:

§  February 14 was a holiday in ancient Rome to honor Juno, the queen of the Roman gods and goddesses.

§  According to Christian tradition, St. Valentine was a priest who lived in Rome during the 3rd century AD and was known for performing secret marriages for couples in love when such unions were prohibited.

§  The French poet Geoffrey Chaucer first linked St. Valentine's Day with courtly love in his poem "Parlement of Foules" in 1382, establishing a connection that has influenced how we celebrate today.

§  The traditions of Valentine's Day vary widely around the world. For example, in Japan, Valentine's Day is celebrated on two different days: February 14 and March 14. On February 14, women give gifts to men, often chocolate, while on March 14, known as "White Day," men return the favor with gifts, often reciprocal chocolate or other treats.

§  In South Korea, Valentine's Day and White Day are celebrated similarly, but April 14 is known as Black Day. On this day, single people gather to mourn their status with a meal of black noodles.

§  The tradition of giving roses on Valentine's Day began in the 17th century when roses became symbols of love and passion.

§  Along with roses, gifts have diversified over the years. Nowadays, people exchange various gifts, from heartfelt cards to unique experiences like cooking classes, spa days, or weekend getaways.

§  The first box of chocolates specifically produced for Valentine's Day was created by Richard Cadbury in 1861 (Note to self: look up if Cadbury chocolates are named after this 17th-century dude), and chocolates remain a popular gift even today.

 Today, especially on this side of the ocean(grateful), the focus has also shifted toward creating personalized gifts that reflect one's unique relationship, such as handmade crafts or custom experiences.

With that information in mind, hope as Valentine's Day approaches, it's an excellent opportunity to celebrate love in all its forms. Perhaps you can write a heartwarming note to a friend, spend quality time with family, or show appreciation for someone who makes your life brighter. So, this Valentine's Day, let's remember that love is a universal language transcending borders, cultures, and time. It has the power to uplift and transform lives. How will you express your love this year?

 

Roll Up Your Sleeve and Donate Blood

 

Imagine a world where a simple act of kindness can save lives—this is what National Blood Donor Month is all about! Back in 1970, President Richard Nixon declared January in the U.S as the time to shine a light on the vital importance of blood donations. Throughout this month and hopefully beyond we can encourage more people to donate blood and celebrate the incredible generosity of those who make it happen.

This year, while drafting a message for our work intranet, the significance of this cause resonated deeply with me. Since December, someone I love dearly back home in Uganda has been battling illness and has needed numerous blood transfusions to maintain her health. Being far away while a loved one is unwell is incredibly challenging, and it’s heartbreaking to know she struggles to access the blood she needs, as hospitals often face shortages. Her blood type is O+, and while we encourage those close to her to donate, I felt compelled to spread awareness about this critical issue. You never know when you or a loved one might need blood to survive.

When I think of blood donation in Uganda, the Uganda Red Cross Society and Nakasero Blood Bank come to mind. I fondly remember the Red Cross vans that visited our schools, inviting brave students to donate blood in exchange for a drink and a snack. (I wasn’t among the brave ones who took the needle).

Today, blood donation in Uganda is overseen by the Uganda Blood Transfusion Service (UBTS) under the Ministry of Health, with the Red Cross as a vital partner, ensuring safe and efficient blood supply nationwide. To be eligible to donate blood, individuals must meet specific health criteria. Before donating, donors receive a free medical checkup, which includes checks for blood pressure, hemoglobin levels, blood type, and malaria and HIV testing (with consent).

Donating blood is not just an act of kindness; it is a chance for donors to monitor their health while providing life-saving support to others, including surgical patients, pregnant women, accident victims, and those with blood disorders. There are various donation locations across the country, as UBTS operates a network of regional blood banks and collection centers in several cities. The Red Cross also runs its own blood donor recruitment programs.

Blood donation is vital, as it saves lives, meets urgent demand, and ensures a diverse blood supply, allowing hospitals to find compatible matches for patients in need. If you have yet to donate, UBTS offers a system that enables donors to designate specific patients to receive their blood. When you donate, you can choose to support a patient, given that your blood types match. If they don’t, your designated patient may still receive priority access to the blood supply. Currently, Uganda requires around 400,000 units of blood annually but often falls short of this demand due to various challenges, including a lack of awareness.

Now that you’re informed, I urge you to consider participating in blood donations. If you are unable to donate, sharing this message with your community will help raise awareness and inspire others to take action. Remember, donating blood is a noble act, and each pint has the power to save up to three lives.

P.S.—If you have blood type O+ and would like to donate, please contact me to designate your blood for my patient.