January is gone, February the shortest month of the
year is already here, if my math serves me right 335 days to the end of the
year. Most people I imagine would still be on track with their resolutions but
since I didn’t make any, as I look back to where the first month has gone, I am
grateful for a lifesaving revelation I got in the month.
You see at my age, with no child of my own, I am
blessed left, right and center with the gift of being an aunt to most of my age
mates’ kids that are in y circle of friends and family. In fact for every month
of the year, there is at least one little one’s birthday that I have to
remember and celebrate. I remember joking towards the end of last year that I
was well tired and done with being an aunt as the presents left a pinch in my wallet
especially at Christmas. Well, not so fast coz the Lord has used this God given
position to teach me something.
This is more so in the last couple of months that I
have constantly spent with a precious 3 year old. It has especially been so
special as with this one it is not just the odd visit a couple of days here and
there all the annual birthday gift but we have literally spent every waking
moment together. In most of this time, I have tried to figure out how the brain
of a 3 year old functions as I have strived to teach her some of life’s’
values.
The journey like many has not come without flaws and
we have shared the good, bad and ugly of life’s falls and achievements with my
already thin patience mostly being tried. On one of these days, it’s like I saw
the world with a fresh pair of eyes as I likened this relationship with mine
and God’s. The resemblance was just so striking that I was humbled speechless.
God, the whole knowing striving to teach me and give
me food to equip me for life’s journey and me sometimes throwing tantrums,
other times acting along that a leap of
joy has been in order only for me to come trampling down again. In a moment of
forgetfulness or total deviance, I have dismissed things that I should clearly
know better by now and yet He loves me still.
In some moments of tough love, I have been stern to
the little one that to an outsider who didn’t know the intentions of my heart,
perhaps mean and unloving but I haven’t waivered and have stood firm by my word
as through the different do’s and don’ts it’s has all been an effort of pouring
out my love for her.
Last Sunday,
as we sat side by side in church (she refuses to go to kid’s church) the sermon
must have been so boring to her that she leaned into me for a cuddle and in
spite of not knowing what goes’ through a 3 year Old’s brain as they go through
the highs and lows of learning from older people, I felt secure in her love. In
that moment I was just this beautiful aunt that she depended and anchored on.
It was so peaceful that I couldn’t help reflecting on how many times I go to
the father’s bosom to just lean in and trust that He knows best and is there to
protect me.
There have been so many moments but perhaps the one
that stands out for me is when I will ask her a question I already know an
answer to and will listen in patiently to see how she relates it back to me
from her understanding. You see for long I puzzled with the question if God
already knows what is in my heart why do I have to go back to Him in prayer and
say it back to Him. When this little one has shared an answer to me, it’s
always so endearing as it’s filled with lots of innocence and emotions that I
have no words to give it save for love. Through a child I have been able to
glimpse at God’s affection for me and I know what He meant when through His son
he said, “Let the little children come to me and do not hinder them, for to
such belongs the kingdom of heaven.” Matthew
19:14.
Children are a blessing indeed, a gift and since I am
the Almighty’s I have echoes of love all around me, the trick is to tune in
more.
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